Appearances

Page 226 – Coffee Party

So, that’s it. This concludes AXE COP: REVENGE ON RAINBOW GIRL.

Thanks to Ethan and Malachai for letting us take a shot at our own AXE COP story. Thank you for reading. If you commented, thanks extra for that. This has been a long slog- I’ve been working on this comic for almost a year now, in between other projects. Getting feedback was the return on my investment and I appreciated all of it. …That was a lie. I didn’t appreciate the guy that said “I don’t like this artwork” a couple of weeks back. That guy can get eaten by sharks. The rest of you, though, you’re nice.

Now that my docket’s wide open, I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself. I’ll be needing new art projects. Got one? Hit me up at my FB page. Don’t mind the zombie and skull art, I do metal album covers and that stuff is all over the place over there.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go treat the kids to a coffee party.

 KIDS’ QUOTES OF THE WEEK

We’re playing pretend.
“Okay, you be Spider-Man and I’ll be the King of Ostriches.”
-Charlotte, 3 years old

“Mommy! Mommy! …Mommy, listen!
Mommy, listen to this! Ready?
Are you ready?? Fish skipple.”
                                        -Amelia, 4 years old

Page 223 – The Kids Don’t Care

So I’m back from tour now. I’ll spare you any details or adventures, no one cares. The big event I’d like to talk about came up two weeks ago with Page 221. It seems I brought Fire Slicer back to life, and I didn’t even know it.

Fire Slicer was killed off in THE MOON WARRIORS GO CAMPING, a one-page story Malachai drew. I recall reading it back in 2011, but I apparently didn’t recall that the Moon Warriors were eaten by the God Of All Bears. I began to see the comments roll in about Fire Slicer being alive again and got all irritated with myself. I’ve been dreading this because in these big battle scenes, I’ve been drawing ancillary Axe Cop characters here and there and then wondering- are they alive? What’s the continuity, here? I had similar concerns about Leaf Man, Hand Cuff Man and Mr. Stocker. I’m pretty sure Mr. Stocker’s dead according to continuity, but I just couldn’t resist putting my favorite non-Axe Cop Axe Cop character in my story.

I went to Ethan a few times asking up on whether a character is alive, but the dude was planning a wedding, drawing a comic, overseeing a TV show and doing any number of other things. Eventually he just said “draw who you want, don’t worry so much about continuity.” That’s not a direct quote, mind you, I don’t feel like hunting through gmail to find that. Anyway. In a kid logic universe, death may mean even less than it does in the Marvel Universe. Hell, Axe Cop was killed on the same page where Fire Slicer returned and it meant almost nothing.

So, yeah, I brought back Fire Slicer by accident. Whoops. Ethan says not to worry about it for reasons that remains to be seen. Let’s just say that God Of All Bear stomachs aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.

KIDS’ QUOTES OF THE WEEK

‎”I’m gonna have the most beautiful wedding,
and if you guys don’t die by then, I’ll invite you!
But if you DO die by then, I’ll invite your
ghosts. Just don’t creep me out.”
                                        -Charlotte, 7 years old

Me: “I dunno Mia, this is a pretty scary story.
I don’t think it’s good for you to hear it before
bed, I don’t want you to have nightmares.”
Amelia: “It’s okay Unca Tommy, when you
say scary things, my head doesn’t
hear them. So I don’t hear them either.”
                                        -Amelia, 3 years old

Page 222 – The Perfect Revenge

And there you have it: the perfect revenge. We got to this part in the story and she laid out the revenge. I said “that’s it?” She said “yeah!” So, why not. An elaborate plan can be a simple murder, sure! You don’t argue with kid logic.

So. Yeah. Rainbow Girl’s dead. Enjoy your meal, Wexter.

The story’s not over yet. Next week: Lightning  Boy strikes back.

KIDS’ QUOTES OF THE WEEK

Charlie has lost a Wii game.
She sadly says “I have no hearts left.”
                                        -Charlotte, 6 years old

Amelia’s woken mommy up. 
“Come on mommy, let’s get up!  I sitting up, you sit up!
I getting out of bed!  I go on my BELLY!  Let’s GO!”
                                        -Amelia, 3 years old

Page 214 – First Aid

Doctors spend years getting degrees and wasting their time. Just stick things back together and walk it off.

…I honestly don’t have much to say today, so this is going to be a pretty anemic blog post. Actually, let me take this opportunity to post something Charlotte and I talked about when she was four years old. We were in her room playing with her stuffed animals, and she established that we live in a world of dogs. I joked that I wanted to eat one of the dogs.

Her: “No, don’t eat one of the dogs. Here…” she brings over a stuffed dog. “This one’s dead.”

Me: “It’s dead??”

Her: “Yeah. So you can eat it.”

Me: “Oh. Well, that’s considerate and creepy. Where’d you get this dead dog?”

Her: “The store.”

Me: “You bought a dead dog at a store?”

Her: “Yeah.”

Me: “What else do they sell at this store?”

Her: “I dunno. Nothing.”

Me: “So it’s a dead dog store.”

Her: “Yep.”

Me: “What’s the name of the store?”

Her: “World Dead Dog.”

Me: “Wow. What’s their slogan? A slogan is something the store says about itself. McDonald’s is I’m lovin’ it. What’s World Dead Dog’s slogan?”

Her: “I’m Puppin’ it.”

Me: “How much can I buy a dead dog for?”

Her: “Twenty cents.”

Me: “What do you do with a dead dog once you’ve got it?”

Her: “You eat it!”

Me: “Do they come in different flavors?”

Her: “Yep. Chocolate and strawberry.”

Me: “This sounds great, but how do the dogs die?”

Her: “Well, they live to 65 years old, and when they get to 75 they die.”

Me: “And World Dead Dog sells them to eat. Aren’t old dead dogs less tasty than fresh ones?”

Her: “No, they’re delicious!”

Me: “So if my dog dies, can I sell it to World Dead Dog?”

Her: “Yep. Fifty-five cents.”

Me: “They’re not making much of a profit, then.”

Her: “No they’re not.”

Me: “Do they have a kids’ meal?”

Her: “They have little monkeys that kids like to eat.”

Me: “Are the monkeys dead too

?”

Her: “Of course.”

Me: “I thought World Dead Dog sold only dead dogs.”

Her: “Well, they sell a few dead monkeys.”

Me: “I see. Do they do catering?”

Her: “What’s catering?”

Me: “Catering is when a restaurant brings food to a place. So do they go to parties and set up piles of dead dogs on long buffet tables?”

At that point I imagined silver catering trays filled with dead dachshunds and burst out laughing hysterically. I’d been trying to hold it in and just couldn’t anymore.

Oh, hey! Ethan and I are throwing a contest on the Axe Cop Facebook page. It’s the GET REVENGE ON RAINBOW GIRL contest, in which you tell us how you’d get revenge on that dastardly villainess. The winner gets a bunch of cool signed Axe Cop stuff. Visit the page for details and enter.

Contest-01

I guess that’s it for this week. Big page next week, and from here on out, not one page of REVENGE ON RAINBOW GIRL isn’t packed with violence. It’s been a peaceful story so far, but things are about to go off. Have a great week.

KIDS’ QUOTES OF THE WEEK

“I have a boo-boo in my mouth
and it’s like a toy for my tongue.”
                                        -Charlotte, 5 years old

“Mommy? I wanna be a drag
queen when I grow up.”
                                        -Amelia, 5 years old

Page 213 – You Will Never Be Evil Again

And there it is, the first blow of the coming battle is struck, and it’s called foul right off. The way this came about was in telling the story, Charlotte got to this part and said:

“…Axe Cop walks up with all his pals. And he says to them “you will never be evil again! And then he chops off the little kids’ heads.”

She immediately rethought it and started to go another way, but it was too funny to let go so I kept it. You HAVE to keep a sudden, unprovoked axe attack on little kids to punish the parents. You know, when I type it out like that, it’s not so funny anymore. But… well… at least it’s funny in the Axe Cop universe. Infanticide is many horrible things, but at least we can enjoy that it’s hilarious in the context of an Axe Cop comic.

KIDS’ QUOTES OF THE WEEK

‎”If The Hulk just played dead,
nobody would ever bother him.”
                                        -Charlotte, 6 years old

Amelia’s in trouble and she thinks her
stuffed bear, Vanilla, has told on her.
She yells 
“Curse you, Vanilla!!”
then throws him down the stairs.
                                        -Amelia, 5 years old